Friday, April 24

Real Estate Definitions

Looking for a home? Learn to read between the lines in those real estate ads.


"Sophisticated city living" - Next to a noisy bar.

"Old World Charm" - Has some woodwork, needs cleaning.    

"Contemporary feeling" - Has no woodwork, needs cleaning.

"Close to Lakes" - Impossible to park from April to October.    

"Wide open floor plan" - Previous owner removed supporting walls.

"Security System" - Neighbor has a dog.    
"Needs TLC" - Major structural damage.    
"Updated kitchen" - Sink no longer overflows.    
"Motivated seller" - Has been on the market for 14 years.    
"Convenient" - Located on freeway entrance ramp.    
"Mint" - Someone has spilled mouthwash on the carpet.  
"Neutral decor" - No murals of nudes, or Elvis, but has brown walls.  
"Move in condition" - Front door missing.  
"Cozy" - No room larger than 9 x 6.  
"Lower level family room" - Ping Pong table over sewer opening.  
"Light open spaces" - Many holes in walls and ceiling.  
"Outstanding" - Painted purple, sticks out like a sore thumb.    

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