Saturday, July 11
Monday, July 6
Funny Operator Joke
Sweet grandmother telephoned Mary Hitchcock Memorial Hospital. She timidly asked,
‘Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is
doing?’
The operator said, ‘I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name
and room number?’
The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, ‘Norma Findlay, Room
302.’
The operator replied, ‘Let me place you on hold while I check with her
nurse.’
After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, ‘Oh, I
have good news.
Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing very well. Her blood pressure
is fine; her blood work just came back as normal, and her physician,
Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged on Tuesday.’
The grandmother said, ‘Thank you. That’s wonderful! I was so worried!
God bless you for the good news.’
The operator replied, ‘You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your
daughter?’
The grandmother said, ‘No, I’m Norma Findlay in 302. No one tells me
shit.’
‘Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is
doing?’
The operator said, ‘I’ll be glad to help, dear. What’s the name
and room number?’
The grandmother in her weak, tremulous voice said, ‘Norma Findlay, Room
302.’
The operator replied, ‘Let me place you on hold while I check with her
nurse.’
After a few minutes, the operator returned to the phone and said, ‘Oh, I
have good news.
Her nurse just told me that Norma is doing very well. Her blood pressure
is fine; her blood work just came back as normal, and her physician,
Dr. Cohen, has scheduled her to be discharged on Tuesday.’
The grandmother said, ‘Thank you. That’s wonderful! I was so worried!
God bless you for the good news.’
The operator replied, ‘You’re more than welcome. Is Norma your
daughter?’
The grandmother said, ‘No, I’m Norma Findlay in 302. No one tells me
shit.’
Speeding?
A woman was driving down the highway about 75 miles an
hour, when she noticed a motorcycle policeman following
her. Instead of slowing down, she picked up speed.
When she looked back again, their were two motorcycles
following her. She shot up to 90 miles. The next time she
looked around, there were three cops following her.
Suddenly, she spotted a gas station looming ahead. She
screeched to a stop and ran into the ladies’ room. Ten
minutes later, she innocently walked out.
The three cops were standing there waiting for her. Then,
without batting an eye, she said coyly, “I’ll bet none of
you thought I would make it.”
hour, when she noticed a motorcycle policeman following
her. Instead of slowing down, she picked up speed.
When she looked back again, their were two motorcycles
following her. She shot up to 90 miles. The next time she
looked around, there were three cops following her.
Suddenly, she spotted a gas station looming ahead. She
screeched to a stop and ran into the ladies’ room. Ten
minutes later, she innocently walked out.
The three cops were standing there waiting for her. Then,
without batting an eye, she said coyly, “I’ll bet none of
you thought I would make it.”
Lost Homework
Little Johnny looked so sad his teacher had to inquire what was
wrong. “What’s the problem?” she asked. “I hope it’s not about
your homework again.”
“Well, uh, yes it is,” Little Johnny says. “I accidentally made my
homework paper into a paper airplane.”
“That wasn’t the smartest thing to do,” said the teacher, “But,
just this once, I’ll let you just unfold the paper and hand it in.”
“Sorry, but that won’t work,” Little Johnny replied, looking even
sadder. “You see, the plane was hijacked!”
wrong. “What’s the problem?” she asked. “I hope it’s not about
your homework again.”
“Well, uh, yes it is,” Little Johnny says. “I accidentally made my
homework paper into a paper airplane.”
“That wasn’t the smartest thing to do,” said the teacher, “But,
just this once, I’ll let you just unfold the paper and hand it in.”
“Sorry, but that won’t work,” Little Johnny replied, looking even
sadder. “You see, the plane was hijacked!”
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