We lost 15 games in a row. One day we had a rain out, and the team threw a victory party.
One free agent hit a home run and had his chauffeur drive him around the bases.
He got his start in baseball as a hot dog vendor but was fired when they caught him heating the franks.
Fans in that town love the ballpark Cokes. They contain the best-tasting water in town.
He's not what you'd call a threat at the plate. He's 0 for 75 against the pitching machine.
That free agent doesn't steal bases, he buys them.
You know you're pitching badly when the fifth inning rolls around and the ground crew is dragging the warning track.
He's such a tough hitter he even gets walks in batting practice.
Our team is so bad we have a "coach boy." That's the kid who goes out and wakes up the coach if one of our runners reaches second.
Coach: "Okay, guys, I want you to line up alphabetically according to height."
Our team was so bad that when they played the National Anthem the flag was at half-mast.
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